Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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