gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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