how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
