Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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