Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
