i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
