I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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