ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
