oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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