TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
