they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
