Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
