it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Still dying that you shit outside
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