So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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