we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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