I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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