i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
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Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
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I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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