She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
