Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
The air taste purple.
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