we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I accidentally had phone sex last night
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
