If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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