Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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