So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
