Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
