don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
