Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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