i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
