I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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