What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
