I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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