At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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