she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
