I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
