I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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