this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
