addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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