Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
