so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
The beer is more important than you right now.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I need moral support for this bender
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
