kristin has been a bad kristin
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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