Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
