Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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