Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
