somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
