No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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