there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
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