Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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