erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
