he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
