Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
