I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
one might say we're banned from that church
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
