i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize